Thursday, July 28, 2011

He's Gone, Gone, Gone

Okay, my husband travels a lot lately with his job. It's nothing compared to how much he traveled before we had kids, but usually it's at least 1 week a month. I'm fine with him traveling and I usually handle it pretty well when he's gone and I usually can keep my cool with my 3 year old when there is no one to hand him off too, but lately it seems like Lucas knows all my buttons to push and knocks me over the edge more than he used too. I need ideas on how to keep my sanity and to stop losing my cool with Lucas. How do women whose husbands are gone more than mine handle it? I feel like I'm on a roller coaster and can't get break. HELP! What do you do to handle the stress when your husband is gone and you get no breaks from your kids?


Britta said...

My husband was gone for a year and a half with the military and I had a 2-3 year old daughter and was pregnant(then of course had an infant for the second half of the year:). My best 'trick' was getting out of the house.

At church on Sunday I'd find three families to go to dinner at their house. Three? you say? Pushing it? you say? Nope. Its what I had to do to keep my sanity. I'd go over to someone else's house- they would LOVE to entertain the 3 year old and cuddle the infant and I got a free meal where I didn't have to worry about clean up at all.

It was a huge bonus to me that I had a lot of people in my ward who were willing and able to help. People were amazed at my willingness to ask in the first place and thought I was 'strong' but in reality, it was sheer desperation!

I'd also say that its important to have your alone time and keep a regular schedule. So even though your husband is gone, still enforce nap/quiet time and still put your kid in their own bed at night, don't make daddy being gone into a party where they get to stay up and have treats. Not worth it.

I could write a novel! Good luck though, its never easy but a lot of women do it.

Alyssa Harper said...

My husband was gone for basically 6 months straight while he worked in a different city, and dang, it was HARD. Felt like I never got a break. I would just watch the minutes tick by, begging for bedtime to come every night so I could get some peace and quiet and revamp my sanity.

I like Britta's suggestion of getting out of the house. Being out and about makes time seriously FLY by, and your kids don't get bored of being cooped up in the house all day. Arrange play dates. Spend time with people. Do all this to spice up your day within your set schedule. I think kids really do need schedules, ESPECIALLY while dad is gone. Something familiar and comforting when (I know) my boy was seriously missing his dad. He was just too young to say it out loud, but he missed him.